I am an Ostrich

Keep your fears to yourself but share your courage with others. 

~Robert Louis Stevenson

I have this quote written down where I can read it every day.  I tend to be someone who wears her emotions on her sleeve, and it's not necessarily the best way to go through life. 
That said, when I'm happy, its a great thing for those around me. When I am not...well, I'm told everyone seems to know it.

I am sure I am not the only one who has this issue...the issue of Avoidance.  When life throws icky stuff my way, I am usually very optimistic and can simply put on the catcher's mitt.  But as I am getting older, I realize that there are some things that I just rather put the mitt down for and turn around.  And since I am a visual person, I see myself just put my head in the sand and pretend I don't see the tough stuff around me.

My grandmother, Nana to those that know me, has had several recent health issues that have kept her in the hospital.  She is not a spring chicken, as she would say.  But she has a fiery personality and she is where I get my stubborn side from.  Let's face it...when we know we're right, we know we're right.

It is this inner strength that I always believed would help us weather any storm.  But sometimes, life is the perfect storm and there is just nothing we can do.

It appears this may be Nana's perfect storm.  This idea shakes me to the core and my head has gone down.  I tell myself that this is the circle of life, and that it is a natural progression of things...but how do I reconcile that positive thought with the pain? I think it takes a special person and mindset to be able to get your head around that.  My husband is one of those rare people, and for that I am grateful.  In the meantime, my head remains in the sand.

Now...do I feel any better for not keeping my fears to myself? No...but as a writer, I do feel a sense of peace in simply getting words out of my head. For those who have taken the time to read, thank you for indulging me!